Monday, December 29, 2008

Christmas vacation... in pictures

Driving to Kansas, learning how to
use the special function for moving
objects on my camara

Playing on Madison's bunk bed...
so much fun

Playmates for a day

Dylan, Brian, Madison and Julie in Andover, Kansas

Making cookies for Santa























In the kitchen with Grandma


Cleaning out Ben's old bedroom

A gift under the Christmas tree
for me... in pastel baby shower
paper? Gift tag upside down?

Taylor...all grown up

To: DT
From: Santa
Shuttle Mission
Time with Grandpa

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Leaving Nebraska and another recipe

We're getting ready to go back home. We've been away exactly one week and 45 minutes ago. We spent the first 13 hours driving to Andover, Kansas and less than than 24 hours visiting my brother's family. It seemed much too short... spent the night, had breakfast and lunch at their house, watched the kids exchange Christmas gifts, and left.

Then, we drove an hour north to McPherson, Kansas to Ben's brother's house. This visit seemed even more abrupt... had dinner, played the game Apples to Apples, spent the night, and left before breakfast.

Our final stop was Holmesville, Nebraska to visit Ben's parents. I'll have to give the details of this stop later. Even though there's not much to tell, we spent 5 days here. All I'll say at this time is, because of the extremely cold temperatures, DT and I stayed in the house most of the time. And we seemed to eat 90% of that time. I managed to score a new recipe for Toffee... I found myself indulging in this decadent treat daily. It was wonderful!

English Toffee

Oil a jelly roll pan (cookie sheet with edges) and place 1 package of graham crackers + 2 additional graham crackers to the edge.

Combine 1 cup butter 1/2 cup brown sugar and boil 3 minutes. Add 1 cup chopped pecans.

Spread over the graham crackers and bake 10 minutes at 350. Turn off the oven, remove pan, and top with 12 oz. chocolate chips. Return to oven to melt chips until you can spread smooth. Refrigerate to harden. Cut or break into pieces.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

News-Making, Drive-Offs, and Road Food, Oh My!

Did anybody see my icy picture of the Center Twp Library on WNDU Channel 16 News Friday night? I had emailed it to their "Weather in Your Backyard" site and while I was on the phone with my sister at 5:30, there it was on TV with my name to credit. I was so excited and thought I'd get a call or email from someone who saw it on TV. Was absolutely no one watching? How sad.

Anyway, we did break free from our icy wonderland. But as we drove 13 hours to get to Andover, Kansas, we drove through one equally wintery scence after another. No state between Indiana and Kansas was untouched by snow and ice. It was beautiful, but caused problems for other travelers on our path. This was especially true on a particular 20-mile stretch of I-80 in Iowa. At that point we had just eaten lunch at Subway and were moving with traffic between 5 and 30 miles an hour as we watched drivers and passengers climb up from their cars in the gulley in the median between east and west-bound traffic or from off the right shoulder. No one ever appeared injured. And every time, it was a single-car slide off. Despite their misfortune, lost time, and expense, I believe every one of them are saying "Thank God!" and meaning it. They were safe.

On another separate note... If you've ever been on a long road trip with another person, you'll empathize when I say -- The smell of each other can become too much. When I was a kid, my family took lots of vacations and always by car or van. And the worst offender of bodily function was always my dad. I know it had something to do with the pathetic mix of foods we were eating along the way, but it didn't matter. The effects were toxic. The lingering stench was unbearable. And with freezing temperatures outside, we couldn't let the windows down. We were stuck with it... time after time.

Our generally uneventful trip yesterday began to remind me of those family vacations as a kid. It wasn't the same noxious fumes, nor produced in the same way. But somewhere in Iowa I smelled a horrific unidentifiable smell and quietly asked Ben, "Did you burp?" He admitted he had with a simple, "Sorry." I was disgusted, and my face curled up to show it. "What did you eat?" I asked.

His sad response: "It could be almost anything." And he began to list an appalling combination of road foods he had put into his body to that point....
"A sausage and egg McGriddle, hashbrowns, 2 coffees, pork rinds, rice crispie treats, skittles, a tuna salad sub sandwich, Dr. Pepper, Cheetos, harvest grain and salsa Sunchips, A&W root beer, Tic Tacs, a Hershey chocolate bar with almonds, dried apple chips, corn nuts."

Friday, December 19, 2008

Ice Storm Beauty



The students of South Bend Schools had a planned day off today, but the teachers were to report for a Record Day. The staff at my school planned a potluck lunch and Christmas ornament exchange on this last day before break. But as I watched the growing list of school delays and closings on TV this morning, I quietly hoped South Bend would excuse teachers for the day. DTs school was one of the many who announced they would be closed due to the winter storm that we all began to expect last evening. Throughout the night I woke up to the sound of freezing rain hitting the house. And this morning I could see bright blue flashes of lightening through the curtains as I heard the rumbles of thunder. In the end, Ben and I went in to our schools (dragging our feet) and DT enjoyed the morning at my school, playing games with another teacher's kid. Afterward, we headed to our library where the iced trees made the entrance of the library glisten like lacy glass. The previous 2 photos are there in front of the Centre Township Library.

And these 2 were taken outside our house right when we got home.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Follow Up to "One of Those Days"

In a recent post titled "One of Those Days," I wallowed in the disappointment of breaking my school soup bowl, having the Christmas tree ornaments I decorated the teachers lounge with turn up missing, and snapping at a co-worker in a rude email. By the end of the day I was disgusted with myself.

My, how things have turned around. Let me share...

The rude email situation- The next day, I received a phone call regarding the co-worker situation. Because of a severe hearing loss, the woman didn't call me herself but relayed the information through a colleague-friend of mine. She helped the woman understand where I was coming from and managed to turn the situation around completely. I was relieved. Shortly afterward, I had an email apology from the woman which made me feel terrible. I quickly responded with my own apology, and I think she understood. I still wish I hadn't sent the email, but I began to feel a little better about it. I just haven't let myself completely off the hook.

The missing ornaments situation- Not knowing where my ornaments had walked off to, the school principal made announcement for me asking that whoever "picked up" my decorations for me, be sure to return them. It worked. The next morning, I found my ornaments safe and sound in the teachers lounge. I don't know where they had been, but it didn't really matter. I had my snowmen back and a renewed faith in the people I work with.

And finally, the broken bowl- Without a bowl, I haven't been able to have soup at school since this incident. I've joked at lunch about the frozen dinners I've been eating. I just haven't allowed myself to buy a new bowl because I'm the one who broke it... even though I would have replaced it by now if someone else had done it. Anyway, this morning after getting some business done around school, Miss Kate a preschool teacher saw me and said she had just left something for me on my desk. She had been the person opened up to and shared that day's misfortunes to. She listened, sympathized, cared and understood. Well, I returned to my office today to find a gift delicately wrapped in pink tissue paper and red ribbon. Inside the tissue paper was a stone-colored, hand-painted ceramic bowl and a bag of ready-to-make soup. As I admired the beautiful bowl, my eyes welled up with tears. This kindness meant so much... it was a gift I hadn't asked for or hinted at. It wasn't a holiday or special occassion. It was unexpected, from the heart, and something I wasn't willing to do for myself. This woman who I met only months ago, saw a hurt and acted with such love and kindness.

When I grow up I want to be like Miss Kate.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Homemade Christmas Ornaments

I must give credit to a 2nd grade teacher at Holy Family School for this recipe. Her class was making these ornaments when I was there on Wednesday, and no matter where I was in the school, I could smell the cinnamon... so good and Christmasy. She was kind enough to let me have her leftover dough and the recipe so that we could make our own at home. They were so simple and I think they turned out beautifully. They're something I'd like to make each Christmas, with a new picture of my little boy every year.



Cinnamon-Applesauce Christmas Ornaments

Needed:
1/2 cup ground cinnamon
1/2 cup applesauce
2 tablespoons white glue
1 heavy duty zipper bag
wax paper
cookie cutter
straw
lid from salad dressing
10-inch lenghth narrow ribbon
child's photograph

Instructions:
Measure cinnamon, applesauce and glue into the zipper bag. Zip. Mix the bag by mashing with hands. Place ball of dough on wax paper. Pat or roll flat to the thickness of gingerbread cookies. Use a holiday cookie cutter to cut the ornaments. Use the straw to punch out a hole at the top of the ornament so that it can be hung by ribbon later. Use the salad dressing lid to punch out a circle in the middle of the ornament for the picture to show through later. Peel up the surrounding dough and let the ornaments dry at least 24 hours. Halfway through drying, gently flip the ornaments. When completely dried, thread the ribbon through the small hole and tie it off. Affix the photgraph from the back. Hang from a doorknob or your Christmas tree. Enjoy all season.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

What's for supper?



I honestly don't hear that question at my house very often because my husband usually makes something fantastic (without even using a recipe) before my little boy and I notice that we're hungry... we usually start getting hungry when we hear him working in the kitchen and smell the garlic and herbs. But, tonight I was the one to suggest that it was time to think about dinner... and when I opened the fridge, nothing looked good. My husband suggested going out to eat, but I said no. You just never feel good about eating out when the only reason is you haven't thought ahead.

My husband decided he'd finish up the gumbo he made a few nights ago. It was delicious. He'd add some more sausage and make fresh rice, and pour the gumbo over it. I decided on a baked potato.

So what would my little boy eat? 5 years old and rather picky. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches have been popular lately, but maybe too popular. My husband decided on chicken nuggets from the freezer called "Dino Bites." What a perfect theme meal for the Flintstones Christmas movie we just picked up from the library. But to go the Dino Bites... black olives and a sliced hard-boiled egg. And in the middle of the plate, my husband created a ketchup and mustard volcano which earned a "Cool!" Now, this meal may sound like a mismatched and thoughless form of child abuse, but honestly these are 3 things that he loves most. And my little boy loved it! I have no explanation and all I can say is "Eeewww."

Monday, December 8, 2008

One of Those Days

I felt like my day got off to a decent start... but by about noon I could see it taking a turn.

I went into the teachers lounge and dumped a Healthy Choice Campbell's soup into my school soup bowl. While it was warming, I went to retrieve my snowmen Christmas tree ornaments that I had decorated a table with last Friday for our staff payday Friday breakfast. I brought my cheesy crock pot potatoes, marble pound cake, and a few festive table decorations... my box of snowmen ornaments and 2 new ones... snowmen on skis that I just bought last year to add to my tree this year. Where were they? I looked under the table, on top of the refrigerator, in the cupboards. I couldn't find them. No, I shouldn't have left them, but I'm only at that school til noon on Fridays and didn't want to take anything away prematurely. But then, shouldn't they be there when I return the next work day? The principal made an announcement for me asking that whoever "picked them up" for me should make sure I get them back. But I haven't seen them yet.

Then the microwave beeped. My soup was ready. Healthy? Yes. Tasty? No. I ate the tasteless soup anyway (not having any other options) and went to the sink to wash my red school soup bowl. My hands were wet as I grabbed a few paper towels to dry it, and in slow motion... my beautiful red bowl slipped out of my hands and broke into countless pieces on the floor. I picked up what I could and was disgusted with my loss.

It didn't end there. Already being in a foul mood because of the missing ornaments and broken bowl, I let loose and emailed a co-worker about a situation in which I believe she used poor professional judgment. And of course I feel terrible for doing it NOW... Although completely true, it wasn't necessary and I'm sure it made her feel terrible.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Feliz Navidad

This morning I played around with the appearance of my blog. I wanted it to reflect the spirit of Christmas I'm feeling. So, I went to www.btemplates.com and looked through a bunch of templates. I settled on this one... blue with holly berries. It seemed simple, and was very much my style. I liked it. But when I viewed my page I realized some of the links and subheadings were in Spanish. In hind sight, I guess I should have expected that when I picked a template called "Blogy Navideno."

Monday, December 1, 2008

The Human Barometer

I've heard people say they know when a storm is coming because they can feel it in their bones. I never paid it much attention. My thinking was, "Yeah, whatever." But, last night I experienced this phenomena first hand. Am I a human barometer? I didn't think so. I never felt aches when the weather changed before. But I'll tell you now I wonder.

I looked into it today. I knew it had something to do with the dramatic drop in barometric pressure. So I looked for a definition of barometric pressure. It is the pressure that air exerts upon the environment - pressure caused by the weight of all the air above the ground pressing down.

I had never considered that gravity pulls air toward the earth like it does everything else. Sad, but true.

The question is: Can people detect atmospheric pressure?

I found that all forms of physical pressure are detectable by humans. Gradual changes in atmospheric pressure are typically undetectable, but severe changes in barometric pressure (changes that occur when weather is changing quickly)can be easier to detect.

As I searched the internet, I found that several conditions affect a persons ability to detect changes in barometric pressure. The most common was arthritis. But others included multiple sclerosis, previous bone fractures, and sprains.

For those of you who weren't reading my blog in October... I had severely sprained my right ankle when I fell off a curb at my college homecoming. And although it's still not completely healed, it's been feeling okay during average use for the past 2 weeks or so. Well, can you guess where I felt the general aching when the barometric pressure dropped dramatically last night and today?

So what does my aching ankle have to do with the weather? Well, most storm fronts are preceded by a drop in atmospheric pressure. And here in South Bend, we've been under a weather advisory for the past 24 hours. This storm ended up bringing in snow through the night and all day. It's getting ugly out there.

Let's continue this science lesson. Precipitation is only possible under certain conditions. One condition which facilitates precipitation is reduction of atmospheric pressure. As a storm front approaches, the atmospheric pressure in the area preceding the front drops considerably. The low pressure front usually indicates a storm or precipitation is coming, and it usually arrives within 24 hours.

As I laid on the couch last night with my ankle aching, I didn't need a meteorologist to give me warnings or tell me about any approaching low pressure fronts. I felt something was about to happen. I have absolutely no idea how accurate my new form of weather prediction will be, but next time I start feeling this ache in my ankle, I'll know we're due for some bad weather.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

our Thanksgiving menu

On Monday DT brought home a Thanksgiving dinner menu that he had written out for us at school. Here it is...

Ham
Pizza
Popsicles
Cranberry
Potato chips
Cookies
Ice cream
Spaghetti
Soda
Milk
Cereal
Cupcakes
Hotdogs










When he saw us preparing turkey, mashed potatoes & gravy, stuffing, corn, green beans, macaroni and cheese, and rolls, he was very disappointed. Somehow, we had failed him.

What I was thankful for? A meal on the table and family to share it with.

our little pilgrims and Indian

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

"I hope you have a merry Christmas."

Goodbye Grandma.

This morning I took my mom to the Amtrak station for her return to New Mexico. I'm so glad she was able to come. DT played more games and read more books while Grandma was here than he would have without her. He never grows tired of attention, books, and games.

Anyway, as my mom and I were getting her things to pack in the car, she said her goodbye to DT. "I'm going back to New Mexico and your mommy's taking me. I'll miss you." He hugged her and looked sad.

Mom and I set off but only made if a half mile before I realized I forgot my cell phone at home and had to turn around for it. When I came in the door, DT looked so surprised and said "That didn't take long." I answered, "Well, I forgot something." He said, "And I forgot to tell you 'I hope you have a merry Christmas'."

He knew that we weren't going to see Grandma for a long time again, and the last thing she had said was "your mommy's taking me." Poor little guy thought I was going with her and would be gone for the holidays. Awwww! Of course I explained that I'd see him after school. And he smiled and hugged me.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Turkey, Ham or Pizza?

For several weeks I've been bummed that my husband, son and I had no Thanksgiving plans to look forward to. My sister's family which is 40 minutes away, is the only immediate family around and they spend holidays with her husband's parents.

I have 3 pairs of aunts and uncles and a 97-year old grandma within an hour of our house, but we rarely see any of them. If my parents were here, I know they'd have all the extended family over for Thanksgiving. Every family would bring something to go with turkey or ham, and we'd sit around, play games and enjoy each others company. But without my parents here it's just kinda strange.

We ran into the same situation last year. So Ben, DT and I drove out to Maryland to spend the holiday with my parents. This year they're in New Mexico which is too far to drive for the short weekend, and too expensive to fly. So... back to my original dilema. Bummed and lonely for the holiday.

I expressed my sadness to Ben. He suggested starting some home improvements. I suggested going to a bed and breakfast. Derek suggested having pizza. It just seemed so sad.

Then my sister called. She knew we didn't have plans and asked if her family could come over. Just when I thought pizza could honestly be in our future, a real Thanksgiving began to unfold.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Loving and selfless, but not hip to pop culture!

My mom is staying with us this weekend. I'm loving it. She came by Amtrak last week from a 2-year Brethren Volunteer Service project in New Mexico to be here for the birth of my niece. She stayed at my sister's house during the week to help her at home when her husband's at work. Loving and selfless as usual.

We've had a great time with her today. She came after lunch, and I made a banana bread thinking she'd appreciate it, but when I saw how dark it was getting on top, I took it out of the oven 10 minutes prematurely. I shouldn't have. I didn't find out how doughy it still was in the middle until I cut into it 2 hours later. I'm no Rachael Ray!

In the 2 hours that the bread cooled, DT and I went shopping with mom at Kohl's and Family Christian Bookstore. Afterward we got Ben to take us to a soup supper fundraiser, and then he dropped mom and I off at church where a movie night was planned. We watched "Dan in Real Life" which was really good...in an emotional-romantic-drama way.

When we got home, I turned on The Food Network. Mom looked with intent for a moment and said seriously, "I think I know her or I've seen her before. Do you know who she is?"

I wanted to say, "What rock have you been hiding under?! Honestly!"

"Yeeaaaahhhh....(pause)....Rachael Ray," I responded, thinking she surely must be putting me on. But she was serious. She didn't know who Rachael Ray is. Not only has she hosted multiple Food Network shows, but she has now had a daytime talk show on NBC for several seasons.

But this incident reminds me of a comment she made in the late 80's. My sister had just gotten home from going to see "Ghost" with her friends and they were oohing and aahhing over Patrick Swayze. Mom overheard their excitement and said "Who?" They said "Patrick Swayze. He's so hot." And to that, mom said, "You saw him at the movies?" "Yeah, we just went to see 'Ghost'." Mom, still confused answered "I don't think I know him. And he go to NorthWood?" NorthWood was our high school!

Friday, November 14, 2008

The Black Pilgrims

Earlier this week I noticed student work on the walls at my school already showing evidence of preparation for Thanksgiving.

In a second grade display were turkeys with bodies made of construction paper on top of tail feathers made of painted paper plates. In the same case were Indian villages. Each student made a teepee by decorating a piece of brown construction paper with Indian-looking symbols and rolling it into a cone and setting it with the others in a fall scene.



A kindergarten display showed autumn-colored tissue paper leaves glued onto construction paper trees.





Just outside my office were colorful 3rd graders' scrarecrows painted on large pieces of white paper with short pieces of straight brown yarn for hair, and small square fabric patches glued onto painted pants.






Then, this morning I saw my first pilgrims... my first black pilgrims. Each student in this class created a mixed media mug shot of a pilgrim. Boys made boy pilgrims, and girls made girls. The girls used pearlescent wallpaper remnants for dresses and white paper doilies for collars or bonnets. Boys made black hats with gold buckles out of construction paper and put real buttons on their white paper shirts. Their scary smiles had pointed teeth and as a true reflection of themselves, the students cut their urban pilgrims out of brown paper.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Carleah Grace Takes First Place


I am blessed again with a baby niece. Carleah Grace was born Thursday morning, November 6 at 8:37 am. Last night Ben, DT and I drove to Plymouth to see her. She is a perfect beauty. She never made a peep or batted an eye, but her dark hair, round cheeks, and tiny fingers made a wonderful first impression.



Mommy, Daddy and baby Carleah



Saturday, November 1, 2008

The Great Pumpkin



Last week I saw a TV ad for the Charlie Brown Halloween special, "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown." I'm pretty sure I watched it on public television every year as a kid. I loved it. It wouldn't have been Halloween without it. So, when I saw that it was going to be on TV this Tuesday, I planned to watch it with DT.

Tuesday night came and went, and I forgot! Not surprising for those who know me well. I've forgotten far bigger events and far more important meetings. But, still I was sad when Ben came home from teaching his night class at Purdue and asked if we remembered to watch the special.

Regardless, DT dressed as "The Great Pumpkin" to go trick-or-treating. A friend from work passed down the costume. DT had seen it in the closet in the spring and has been excited since then to wear it. Ben walked around the subdivision with DT and then we drove to 2 houses of people we knew...we didn't stop at either one since their porch lights weren't on, but we did see a lot of trick-or-treaters out and about.

At home I passed out Kool-Aid Burst drinks and pre-packaged popcorn balls. We had 24 trick-or-treaters in the hour and a half that I had the light on. Overall, I was impressed with the costumes and manners, but of course there were a few kids that were "too old" to be trick-or-treating. The presidential election is in 3 days. I'll vote for whoever sets a legal trick-or-treating age of 10 and younger.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Enjoy a hayride if you can.



Last weekend, before the first snow fell, the 3 of us enjoyed the crisp autumn weather at Bendix Woods County Park. The church we've started attending had planned an afternoon of hayrides, hotdogs and s'mores over a campfire, and fellowship. Ben and I were introduced to several church members and DT played with the other kids on the playground.

When we got there, the 3 of us hopped aboard the first moving wagon for a hayride. The loose straw made for a fun trip. Dressed in his winter coat and gray gloves, DT had a great time burying his body. When the wagon came to a stop, Ben got off but DT and I took off again. The second trip was a bit longer and our wagon had more kids DT's age. They laughed and played, not noticing our beautiful surroundings. It was gorgeous.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Loss of an old friend

New truck (blue)......Old friend (red)


Getting a new vehicle is always exciting. Or at least I say it should be. I've enjoyed shopping around for trucks the past few weeks with Ben. It gave us extra time together... something we agree we're consistently shorting ourselves. Something we know we need to do more of. So, even if our time together wasn't a romantic evening away, I feel it was good bonding time as we searched and test-drove truck after truck, in town after town.

His trade-in was a red 2-door 1994 Chevy Silverado. Throaty and stout. A good and trusted friend. A working-man's truck. But it's rust was spreading. The air-conditioning didn't work. It had a cracked windshield.

The "new" truck is a blue 4-door 2004 Chevy Silverado. Clean and well-cared for. Crisp and modern. Family friendly. Immaculate.

Nonetheless, it was sad to see the old truck go. And worse... to hear the dealership say they wouldn't even try to sell it on the lot. They would send it out for auction.

The deal is done. And I'm more than ecstatic about the obvious upgrade, but poor Ben is having to deal with the loss of that old red friend. It isn't going so well.

Good-bye Autumn


Leaves have been dropping by the thousands in our yard daily for weeks now. But a few days ago I noticed that the tree in our front yard, although odd and unwanted, had suddenly lost it's green and become the most spectacular colors of autumn. I snapped these 2 photos not knowing how long I could expect it to last.

Well, this morning we woke up to snow. Enough to have to brush off the car before heading off to work and enough that the roof is still white this evening. It too was beautiful, but I just wasn't ready to say good-bye to autumn.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Sprained Ankle: Day 16


So this is what it looks like now. It's on the mend, but still not back to normal. The ankle is still swollen, but the swelling in the rest of the foot is down. There's bruising on the toes, inner and outer ankle, and above the heel. It's still uncomfortable to walk in shoes, but I'm doing it. I had x-rays taken again on Friday, which showed soft tissue and ligament damage, but no bone fractures. That's good news, right?

Sunday, October 26, 2008

A Bear-y Unusual Adventure


At the beginning of the school year DT's kindergarten teacher sent home a letter telling about the class "share bear". It is a small fuzzy teddy bear packed with a journal inside a small fuzzy bear backpack. His name is Duncan and he goes home with someone different every Thursday after school and returns to class Friday. While he's gone, he writes about his adventures in his journal. And on Friday the teacher shares this adventure while the class sits in a circle with Duncan in the arms of whoever took him home.

Ben and I have had our schools' parent-teacher conferences on our calendar since the beginning of the school year. They were Thursday. And yes, it just happened to be the same day that DT unexpectedly was crowned the new care-giver of Duncan the coveted kindergarten share bear.

What a strange day. If I didn't know better, I wouldn't believe the story Duncan told in his journal entry that day. He and DT went home with the after-school care teacher, had dinner, and played games at her house all evening.

Now, I can only think of 3 other times we've used babysitters in the evening. Once when DT was 4 months old, I asked the Fox's from church to watch DT so that Ben and I could go to an employers Christmas party. Once my cousin Carrie watched DT so Ben and I could go see the pastor at church. And once last spring when I again asked Carrie so that I could go out for a "girls' night out" with some high school friends when Ben wasn't going to be home.

I don't feel good about asking people to do things for me. Baby-sitting included. I'm humbled. So, this time I say thanks to Mrs. Moffitt and her daughter Liesa for watching DT and Duncan, and for sharing Duncan's big adventure.


Saturday, October 25, 2008

Behavior shaping and Pumpkins


We bought 2 pumpkins last weekend at Thistleberry Farms. The intent was to carve them into jack-o-lanterns and bake the seeds. DT was excited and counting down the days til Wednesday, the day we told him we'd "probably" be able to get to it. And as you can imagine, seeing these pumpkins whole for 4 days was not easy for a 5-year old. But we had a busy week and knew Wednesday would be the first possible day we could even think about them.

We've tried to be very consistent in our raising of DT. If we tell him "no" and he continues with an offense, we follow with some action that we feel appropriate. We want him to know that we mean what we say. So following through is necessary. Not just sometimes. Everytime. Consistency is key.

Behavior shaping works when a child knows what to expect. If you tell a child "no" and you consistently (without exception) follow through, the child learns to expect the response. And the child begins to makes choices, knowing that response will follow if he chooses the behavior again. He becomes less impulsive and begins talking himself out of the unacceptable behavior.

For example: DT throws a book. I tell him that's not acceptable behavior and to pick it up and put it where it belongs. Anytime he throws a book, I tell him the same thing. He always has to pick up the book and put it away. Eventually, the behavior is extinguished. He knows that if he throws a book, he has to pick it up. It's a natural consequence and he knows that's what will happen.

Well, there's another side to teaching consistency. If I tell DT we'll carve pumpkins on Wednesday and he's looking forward to it, we need to carve pumpkins on Wednesday. Even though we just got back from the barber shop and DT needs a bath. And even though it's 7:00 and we haven't started making supper. And even though tomorrow both parents will be at school for more than 12 hours because they're teachers and it's parent-teacher conference day, we need to carve pumpkins.

And so we did. And hopefully DT learned that we stick to our word.

Val's Tunes


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